Can't
by Drusilla52
Summary: She tried to give him up, but she soon realizes, she just can't. POST-S4 finale. A mix of fluff and angst. ;


Note: A bunny I just had to get out of my head… enjoy!

Title: Can't

Summary: She tried to give him up, but she soon realizes, she just can't.  
Pairing: E/S  
Setting: Post-S4 finale  
Genre: Romance/Angst  
Rated: T

Dis: Don't own TB(Sookie Stackhouse Novels)

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Sookie lay in her bed facing the wall, eyes wide open, but unseeing. The past twenty-four hours have undone her. Her best friend was dead. Dead by the hands of a jealous, insane woman that Sookie murdered. Jason politely asked her to make sure she stayed in town; because it was protocol, and even though he said she had nothing to worry about… she worried. Her friend was dead… DEAD, and she couldn't help but to blame herself. Gran, Debbie, Tara… Hell, even Eric and Bill almost died just to protect her from death.

"I'm sorry," she whispered softly, a lone tear falling down from the corner of her eye to the comforter. But that was when dark thoughts started to fill her head. Bill. If he'd had just come clean about his intentions, if he and the queen had just left her alone, none of this would have happened. A part of her didn't want to blame Bill that he'd been following orders: and she just told that part of her to shut up. Maybe it HAD been for the best to end things with him but with all that happened there was one person she wanted the most and it was killing her that she couldn't call him. How could she? She'd just broken his heart.

She missed him. GOD she missed him. She wished she was in his dark little hidey hole in her living room, curled up around him. She wanted his arms around her, protecting her. He probably didn't know what happened yet. After killing Debbie she'd crawled to Tara and had held her bawling for how long she didn't know, until crawling to a phone, and calling Jason. The blood, so much blood, it made her sick now just thinking about it. Jason, then other officers had come, and then Alcide. Someone had called him to tell him Debbie had been killed and the look he'd given her let her know he'd be coming soon for a talk… and she was scared.

"Eric," she whispered, eyes closing, fear enclosing around her heart. "Eric… I need you. I can't… I can't do this without you. Call me selfish but I can't… I… I can't!"

Then she was sobbing again. Sobs that wracked her body as she clung to a pillow that still smelled of the vampire she was calling for. She cried and screamed until she fell asleep. Jason, who agreed to stay so that she wasn't alone in the house, didn't come to her because she told him she needed to be alone. Now? That was far from what she wanted.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, she sighed deeply, bottom lip trembling, and she called to him one more time…

"Eric…"

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Red-rimmed eyes filled with blue skies snapped open. Alert he sat up, feeling ragged. Something was wrong. Terribly wrong and the idea was confirmed when his phone started to ring. He instantly grabbed it and looked at the screen.

Jason.

"Sookie?" he asked, holding the phone up to his ear.

"Eric. There was an accident. She needs you."

"Where is she?" he demanded, pulling on a black silk shirt but leaving it unbuttoned. He snatched up a random pair of black slacks from the ground and started yanking the on, leaving his phone cradled to his ear.

"The house."

"What happened?" he demanded, zipping his pants.

Last night, while tearing up his room, a large pang of sadness and despair had overcome him. It had come from Sookie and it had taken everything in him to not race to her. She had ended things with him, and was mourning, and he couldn't help but to have wondered if that large pang of loss was for him… or Bill. Now, now he hated himself for not going to her because it had been something much, much worse…

"Debbie was here. She tried to kill Sookie."

"I'll kill that fucking dog bitch!" roared Eric.

"Sookie has you beat there."

"Sookie killed her?" asked Eric, feeling a sense of pride.

"Yes… after Debbie killed Tara."

"Oh." He never liked Tara, but she was Sookie's friend, and so he tolerated her. With her gone, Sookie has another loss tacked up, and Eric felt pity for his little fairy. It was then he heard her calling for him. A soft whisper in his mind and he dropped his phone and ran out the door then took to the skies. The air rushed through his silky blond hair as trees and city lights became a blur. He hovered, just outside Sookie's window moments later, and then silently opened the window. He could smell the blood of the wolf and human girl, but luckily no fairy. She looked frail on the bed and he didn't hesitate to crawl into the bed and pull her close. She started, gasping in fear, but he cradled her head to his chest.

"Shhh it's me," he whispered.

"Eric?" she whispered brokenly, making him want to cry tears of blood as he had done the other night at her loss.

"Yes," he said, slightly rocking her. "It's me."

"I'm so sorry…"

"It is I that is sorry for your loss," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her temple.

"I should have never told you to go away." He tensed, then that ugly thing called hope started to spread through his chest. Dare he believe it? Was she saying what he was hoping? "I love you so much. Please… please don't go."

"Sookie… You are not in your right mind," he said. "Sleep. We shall talk later."

"No… No!" She sat up, cupping his face in her hands, her sad eyes meeting his worried. "I love you. When… when I needed someone, when I went through who I wanted with me… all I could think about was you. I ran through my head all the names of those that I've lost and thinkin' about you almost dyin' for me nearly undid me… I can't be without you. I tried, but I CAN'T."

"Sookie…" He cupped her face in his now, and they were nose to nose. "What are you saying?"

"Be mine. Please? Just… never leave me."

"Never," he promised. "I'll never leave you. You are mine." His eyes flashed and his fangs itched to come out. "Say it."

"I'm yours."

She pressed her lips to his and every single fiber in his body wanted to consummate the claim now but that part she brought out in him, the humane part, stopped. Before losing his memory, before finding his humanity, he would have bedded her. Now? Now he wanted the moment to be right so he slowed the kiss, making it more of a kiss of comfort than passion.

"I love you. When you awaken, we will talk on this more. For now I am here. Sleep, my darling Sookie."

"Can we go to your cubby? I want you beside me when I wake in the morning. Please?"

"Of course."

He carried her down the stairs. Jason was surprised to see him but didn't stop him as he went to the large cabinet. He gave him directions to not let anyone enter and that if the wolf Alcide came to shoot him before he set one foot in the house. With no protest from Sookie he looked down to see her sleeping again. Carefully, he brought her down to what one would consider his room, and laid her upon the bed where they'd shared blood and formed the strong bond. He lay beside her, protecting her, basking in the feel of her in his arms once more: until the sun rose and brought him to death's sleep.

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Sookie awakened to the feel of her vampire wrapped around her. There wasn't a part of his body that wasn't touching hers. His chest was her pillow, his arms and legs entangled with her own, and even their feet were pressed together. Looking up she saw he was asleep and she smiled, fingertips going to his lips and tracing the shape of them.

"You stayed," she whispered, getting no reaction from him because of his sleeping. Sitting up, she promised to return, but she needed to do a few things. She went up the ladder and entered her living room, closing the doors behind her. The clock read noon and Jason was sprawled out watching a television he put in the living room.

"Mornin' Sleeping Beauty," he said to her with a smile.

"Hi…" She started playing with her hands and then finally smoothed them down her legs. "What's the word?"

"Your claim of self-defense is sticking. Alcide actually told the police about Debbie's jealousy of you."

"He could get in trouble for that, turning against one of his pack to protect an outsider."

Jason shrugged. "So long are you are safe, it doesn't matter to me."

Sookie winced. Great, perhaps another name to add to the list of people's lives she's ruined while they tried protecting her. Her good mood was slowly slipping so she excused herself. Walking around she saw the blood had been cleaned up and reminded herself to thank Jason later. The windows were wide open, letting in the fresh air. She went to the bathroom first and stripped, cleaning away her sorrows the best she could with the hot water. She changed into grungy clothes and called in sick. Sam told her to take all the time she needed off and she thanked him before hanging up.

She made herself some toast and ate it while watching TV with Jason. She did some chores and did her best to avoid the spot. Every fiber of her being wanted to escape the house for a while but she also didn't want to separate from Eric. Perhaps she could talk him into taking her away from here for a while… then she remembered Jason's warning to not leave and she nearly pulled the hair from out of her head.

Defeated she went back down to lay with Eric and remained there till he awakened. She smiled and snuggled into him as he wrapped his arms around her and she looked up at him, her face suddenly somber.

"I'm so sorry for pushin' you away. I was so stupid for-"

"You're only human," he said, teasing her. "You're allowed to make foolish mistakes."

"Eric…" She looked down then up at him through her lashes. "I meant what I said last night. I want to be yours."

"Sookie…" He sat her up with him then dropped his fangs, biting into his hand. "If you want to be with me, forever, then take my blood, my life. Be MINE and until the day I die and part from this Earth there will be no one but you."

"Eric…" Her eyes became unfocused. She was really doing this! She tilted her head to the side, offering her neck to him before taking his hand, blood dripping onto her bare legs but she didn't care! "Yes… Yes!"

She took his blood and he hissed between his teeth as she drank it before descending upon her. He wanted her neck, but he decided he would save that spot for later when their clothes were on the floor and he was inside her. For now, he took her wrist and bit into it much like the night before battling the witches. She moaned, and then all they knew was bliss. There was no feeling of loss, danger, or sorrow. Just love between a vampire and his fairy.

Later, much later, they lay naked upon the sheets, dual wounds at their necks made from his fangs and her blunt teeth: a move that had undone him to his very core. He had her in his arms, her warmth seeping into his skin, and he was the happiest he's ever been in his entire existence.

"What do we do now?" she asked softly, tracing her fingertips over a flat nipple.

"Whatever you wish to do, my love," he whispered back, his own fingertips ticking up the golden skin of her back.

"I don't want to be here anymore, in this hous, at least not for a while."

"You will come home with me."

"Jason said I needed to stay put."

"You let me worry about Jason and everything else. I want you happy, and you will be, even if I have to break the bones of everyone in this town until they see things your way…"

"Eric!"

Eric huffed. "Fine. I will be polite, but politeness only gets one so far in this world, Sookie."

"I love you," she said once again, pressing her lips to the underside of his chin.

"And I you. Always."

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**END**

Hope you enjoyed my little bunny… now that it's hopped out of my head I can focus on the rest of my night!


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